1. |
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Before too long
Before too long I will sing
The “You Can Screw Me Over No More” song
Like this…
I’ll pay you down until I’m done
I’ll pay you up and then I’m gone
And you won’t have me around
To take your moods out on
Before too long, before too long
Gonna put my “Running Away From You” shoes on
Before too long I’ll pay you off and then I leave
But for the cash you be sure to grieve
And I know It’s gotta be so incredibly good to breathe
Before too long oh yeah, before too long whoa yeah
Before too long
Aright, here we go…
Before too long, before too long
I’m gonna sing the “I Got You Out Of My Face” song
I’ll pay you down until I’m done
I’ll pay you up and then I’m gone
And you won’t have me around
To take your moods out on
Before too long
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2. |
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Every night I sleep and I dream about you
And I wish I didn't have to wake up at all
Gonna love you baby each and every day
Every spring every summer every winter and fall
Don't wanna be the albatross tied around your day
Don't wanna choke you out like some bitter pill
The anchor that drags you down the bottom of the bay
Or the cross that you have to drag up every hill
No way no way no way...
Try to understand how it is with me today
When you are not around my life is very boring
Can't wait until I go home and hit the hay
I'll be holding you as soon as I am snoring
Every night I sleep and I dream about you baby
I really don't like waking up cause it's a bummer
Gonna love my baby each and every day
Every winter every fall every spring and every summer
OK OK OK OK…!
Lets Go!
Every night I sleep and I dream about you baby
I wish that I didn't have to wake up at all
Gonna love my baby each and every day
Every spring every summer every winter and fall
Don't wanna be the albatross tied around your day
And I don't wanna choke you out like some bitter pill
The anchor that drags you down the bottom of the bay
Or the cross that you have to drag up every hill
No way no way no way no way…
OK
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3. |
Sleep
03:32
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Don’t like being awake too much
I'd rather sleep any day
Think maybe it’s time to crash
Won’t catch this boy counting sheep no way
Snoring like a Piper Cub
And dreaming about the one I love
I wish I could take the alarm clock
And just throw it away
Sleep is the way that I
Escape the things I face each day
Stress is vaporized from life
Leaving behind only fun and play
My eyes slam shut like window shades
I smile as reality fades
Nothing I would rather do
Than sleep my life away
With you
I wake up and I watch the news
I say "this really stinks"
Waking up I did not choose
Sleep is so much better I think
Snoring like a tiger's growl
I’ll dream about you anyhow
It's easy to remove the blues
With forty simple winks
I don’t like being awake too much
I'd rather sleep every day
Think maybe it’s time to crash
Won’t catch this boy counting sheep no way
Snoring like a Piper Cub
And dreaming about the one I love
Wish that I could take the alarm clock
And just throw it away
Nothing I would rather do
Than to sleep my life away
With you
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4. |
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I love the summertime cause it's always warm and sunny
Everybody's nice and the jokes are always funny
Two times every day my watch is right on the money
Everywhere I go, it will always be 4:20 look out
4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20
My friends all want to know when I'm gonna fix the clock
But that will never happen because I like where it stopped
This special time of day and I would never ask for more
Than to have my entire life stuck at twenty after four
It's really awesome here and you know I like it plenty
Everywhere I go, it will always be 4:20 look out
4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20
My attitude is better now I'm cheerful bright and sunny
And I pass around the smiles like a stoned out Easter Bunny
Nothing gets me down because I love everybody
Everywhere I go, it will always be 4:20 look out
4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20 4:20
I love the summertime cause it's always warm and sunny
Everybody's nice and their jokes are always funny
Two times every day my watch is right on the money
Everywhere I go, it will always be 4:20
Everywhere I go, it will always be 4:20
Everywhere I go, it will always be 4:20
Everywhere I go, it will always be 4:20
Hehehe It’s 4:20!
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5. |
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Come with me baby
Come with me now
I want you baby
To take me around
Cause you know that the world belongs to you
Dont climb under the ground
I am gonna carry you away
To another town
When summertime brings you t me
Winter carries you away
I am gonna walk right across your mind
Each and every day
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6. |
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Alright are we having fun yet?
Hehehe here we go…
The telephone is ringing but I aint picking it up
The song they always singing is "Give Your Money To Us"
So instead of banging my head against the walls
I’m gonna have to start screening my calls
The answering machine is gonna fix that mess right up
Modern man has never seen a greater invention
From bill collectors it's electronic intervention
And once you include a Caller ID
I can avoid any number just as pretty as you please
And never never look at the phone with apprehension
Modern man has never seen a greater invention
From annoying people it's the best kind of intervention
Now I just wanna thank my Caller ID
For getting in between my mother and me
I never never look at the phone with apprehension
So go ahead and dial my number until the cows come home
If I don't answer just leave your message at the tone
Cause now I only talk to the people that I like
And everybody else can go take a hike
And I don’t even have to unplug the phone
Modern man has never seen a greater invention
Oh the telephone no longer gives me stress or tension
And now that I got me a Caller ID
I can avoid everybody just as sweet as you please
I never never look at my phone with apprehension
Oh I never never look at the phone with apprehension
Yeah I never never look at the phone with apprehension
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7. |
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I had a nasty lunch and they have a lot of gall
To be selling this stuff if it gets people itching
This Hot & Sour Soup that I got at the mall
Tastes like it came out of Jeffrey Dahmer’s kitchen
It’s really disgusting cause it stagnates there for weeks
I wouldn’t even try to feed it to a vulture
This Hot & Sour Soup, well you know it really reeks
If I have another cup then I bet I get an ulcer
Yes I will, give me a pill
Paid the bill, getting ill ill ill
Check out all the weird looking floaties in there
I have no idea what the heck it is I’m seeing
I think maybe a mushroom, but then why is it growing hair
It’s waving at me now and pretty soon I will be fleeing
They gave each other fives when I took the order out
They handed me this soup with a smile and a cracker
I’m breaking out in hives and my teeth are falling out
They ought to keep the stuff in a Nuclear Reactor
Yes they should, wish they would
no darn good, no darn good alright
Gonna complain to the management soon
I only wanted lunch not a Top Secret Weapon
This isn’t supposed to disintegrate the spoon
Away from this stuff I will surely be stepping
And soon they’ll be scraping Hot & Sour off the wall
A very bad decision and I really want to can it
This Hot & Sour Soup that I got at the mall
Tastes like it came from another planet
This Hot & Sour Soup that I got at the mall
Tastes like it came from another planet…
Oh yeah…
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8. |
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Why am I out here alone?
I look at the sky but I'll never know
Don't know what to do as I wait out the tears
And wonder if you can see me down here
You'll never know that I loved you so
Maybe that's why I came out here to cry
If you tell me baby you don't believe a word that say
Aint gonna stop me from trying baby I gotta say these things every day
And if you tell me my sweet baby that my words don't mean a thing
Gonna tell you that I love you with every song that I sing
Oh yeah
Why am I out in the cold?
Just me and my song of the words never told
And as I live every one of my years
I’ll wonder if you can see me down here
I love you so just can't let you go
Maybe that's why I came out here to cry
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9. |
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Such a pretty girl
I fell in love with you
Upset your mother’s world
She does not approve
But now I am gonna take the time to say
The sun shines down on a different life every day
Excluded from their world
I sing my song to you
It's never lonely here
Your love is sweet and true
And now I am gonna take the time to say
Every dog has gotta have its every day
In the only world that matters
I sing to you
It's wonderful here
Your love is real and true
And now I am gonna take the time to say
I would want to have things no other way
Such a pretty girl
I’m still in love with you
No matter how much time goes by
That will always be true
So now I am gonna take the time to say
The sun shines down on a different life every day
OK
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10. |
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You’re walking down the street and
You’re minding your own business
Then suddenly on fire
You say “What the hell is this?”
Bystanders are looking
There’s smoking and there’s flaming
Before your clothes start cooking
You better pray that it starts raining
Spontaneous combustion
Well hey now aint that something
Can't be very pleasing
To be burning for no reason
Yeah you know I aint seen nothing
Like spontaneous combustion
Spontaneous combustion oh yeah
This is a smoke free city
And you’re bound to get in trouble
The fire truck so pretty
Better get here on the double
This doesn’t happen often
So give me a suggestion
An ashtray or a coffin
That is the burning question
With spontaneous combustion
Well hey now aint that something
Scientific treason
If you’re burning for no reason
Oh yeah you know I aint seen nothing
Like spontaneous combustion
You know I aint seen nothing
Like spontaneous combustion
You know I aint seen nothing
Like spontaneous combustion
Oh yeah
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11. |
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Like the sun shining down on my face
You brighten up my world every day
And so I hope you aint going no place
Cause I would never never want it that way
Oh no I really wouldn't like it that way
You are everything that matters to me
And there is nothing that I wouldn't do
To keep you in proximity
To spend the rest of my days with you
And I will always be there for you
Like the sun shining down on my face
You brighten up my world every day
And so I hope you aint going no place
I would never never want it that way
Oh no I really wouldn't like it that way
I really wouldn't like it that way
I really wouldn't like it that way
I really wouldn't like it that way
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12. |
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There is a boa constrictor
Choking the life out of me
Happy go lucky and everything is ducky
Then suddenly I cant breathe
Oh suddenly I can't breathe
Oh no…
Like there's a Green Anaconda
Coiled around my neck
You been putting the squeeze on me big time baby
Better let me catch my breath
You are constricting me to death
There just aint too many songs you’ll see
Concerned with herpetology
So I’m gonna wave my reptile flag
Because they eat rats all day long you see
And I say better them than me
Like some weird spitting cobra
Reared up and ready to strike
When you squirt neurotoxin in somebody’s eyes
They will forget what you look like
Right away they will forget what you look like
If I were a viper baby
I’d shed my skin for you
Aint no diamondback gonna shake its tail
Any better than I do
I’m gonna flick my tongue at you
There just aint too many songs you’ll see
Concerned with herpetology
So I’m gonna wave my reptile flag
Because they eat rats all day long you see
And I say better them than me
They eat rats all day long you see
And I say better them than me
They eat rats all day long you see
And I say better them than me…
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13. |
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I love my darling wife with all of my heart
And I don't enjoy my life any time we are apart
But one thing creeps me out about those wedding vows we said
We gotta stay together until one of us is dead
We gotta stay together until one of us is dead
Oh dread
We both said “I Do” back in 1991
Very much in love and having lots of fun
And all of that holds true right until this very day
I don't want to imagine things any other way
No I don't want to imagine things any other way
No way
I love my sweetie girl with all of my heart
And I don't enjoy my life any time we are apart
But one thing creeps me out about those wedding vows we said
We gotta stay together until one of us is dead
We gotta stay together until one of us is dead
Oh dread
So I watched the VHS from our monumentous day
Smiling and happy yes it will always be that way
But it makes me wonder who is going in the hearse
Age before beauty or maybe ladies first
Age before beauty or maybe ladies first
Who knows?
I love my darling wife with all of my heart
And don't enjoy my life any time we are apart
Just one thing creeps me out in the wedding vows we said
We gotta stay together until one of us is dead
We gotta stay together until one of us is dead
We gotta stay together until one of us is dead…
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14. |
It's All Over
03:34
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It's all over we have gone to war
You are the one I been looking for
Walk into my corridor
Today, today
And it's all over for our land
Children take me by the hand
Satisfy your trip demand
Today, today
And when I gaze into your eyes
All my days go to tranquilize
The dreams that fall out through forgotten rain
Some will make you happy
But others will drive you insane
Today, to stay
And it's all over we have gone to war
You are the one that I been looking for
Walk into my corridor today
So what are you waiting for I say
Walk into my corridor today
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15. |
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Tell me why do you want to ignore me
Trapped here all alone in this world my friend
I love everything that I see before me
So open up your soul and let me in
Tell me why is it that you don't see me
Looking right through me like some kind of ghost
One thing maybe that you don't need me
But indifference is the thing that I fear the most
Oh no, hey!
Tell me why you don't want to receive me
Awful is the way that makes me feel
Why is it you were always trying to deceive me
When all I want to do is to keep it real
Tell me why is it that you don't hear me
Might as well be talking to the wall
I hope one day you volunteer me
To join the human race with you after all
Tell me why do you want to ignore me
Stranded all alone in the world my friend
I love everything I see before me
So open up your soul and let me in
Tell me why do you want to ignore me
Said it all before and I say it again
Love everything I see before me
So open up your soul and let me in
Open up your soul and let me in
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16. |
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Woke up one morning
Springs digging into my back
Stood before the refrigerator
And brace myself for attack
The owner came marching along right then
Where the hell is my rent?
Lost my mind right there and then
So I told her to get bent
And out the door I went…
Every day there was a nightmare
I woke up every night to scream
The only time things were alright there
Is if I’m somewhere else it seems
And it's like some scary dream…
And later on that evening
I saw her again by chance
Before I could even say one word
I was attacked by killer ants
She opened up her yap right then
Where the hell is my rent?
Lost my mind right there and then
So I told her to get bent
And down the road I went…
Oh my life is so much better these days
Getting by aint so hard
And once a year I’ll think about
My scary old landlord
When I sign her Mother's Day card…
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Gary Tucker Bath, Pennsylvania
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